Xu Golden Lily - 10 Years On

Asia's First Dinghy Sailing Gold Medallist
1. Auflage 2025
ISBN: 978-1-917801-21-8
Verlag: Fernhurst Books Limited
Format: EPUB
Kopierschutz: 6 - ePub Watermark

E-Book, Englisch, Band 1, 256 Seiten

Reihe: Making Waves

Golden Lily is the fascinating autobiography from Asia's first ever dinghy sailing gold medallist. It tells of her learning to sail and becoming a full-time athlete at just 10 years old. At that age Lijia Xu was taken away from her parents and enrolled in the gruelling Chinese training regime, a programme meticulously prescribed across all sporting disciplines to catapult the nation's talented youngsters to international champions. It is a rare insight into a shocking world of relentless physical training and unquestioning mental compliance. Lijia's honest and heart-felt account takes you on her journey from physical disabilities and debilitating injuries to learning to think for herself, eventually going on to achieve her dream of becoming an Olympic gold medallist. Now, ten years since its first publication, Lily has updated the story. She tells of her third and final Olympic campaign at Rio 2016 and then training to be a sports journalist and covering Tokyo 2020 and Paris 2024 as a reporter. Lijia opens up about her secret relationship with her English coach and their subsequent marriage, as well as talking about her post-Olympic sailing including IMOCA 60s, M32s, J80s and Waszps. This is an inspirational story of a young woman's will to succeed despite all that her background threw at her.

Lijia Xu was born in Shanghai in 1987. She was approached to become a sailor in 1997 and from the age of 10 Lijia travelled all year round to sail and train; becoming a full-time sailor shortly after her 10th birthday. She was a double winner of the Optimist World Championships before moving onto Olympic campaigning, winning bronze at Beijing 2008 and gold at London 2012. She is now a sports journalist covering the Olympics and many sailing events.

Autoren/Hrsg.

Xu, Lijia

Leseproben

Chapter 2

My Family

I was born in 1987 in Shanghai, the largest city in China. Five of us shared a two bedroom flat which was just 20 square metres. My grandparents lived in one room, while I shared the other room with my parents, all sleeping on the same bed. This is how it was for the majority of city dwellers – only suburban families would have their own, more spacious, home.

My parents met through a mutual acquaintance and began dating soon afterwards. Although their relationship felt more like a partnership than a romance, it reflected the values that shaped many marriages of that era. In Chinese culture, compatibility – including family background, education and financial stability – is often prioritised in relationships. This may sound strange and superficial to western readers, but, with a history of arranged marriages for hundreds of years, the freedom to choose who to marry is already a significant step forward!

My mum, who stands at 174cm, was considered very tall in China, and this caused her a lot of problems in finding a partner. Dad turned up just in time, with a height of 180cm; Shanghainese; big eyes; smart mind; humorous and the youngest in his family, meaning he was well taken care of.

My father took advantage of the fact that he could stay in my mum’s home with her parents because she was the only child in Shanghai (my mum’s brothers and sisters lived in another province). He saw my mother as a tall, quiet and diligent woman who could do all the housework.

Their approach to choosing and deciding on a marriage partner was based on this belief in matching, and they don’t see anything wrong with this since it is what happens for most Chinese. They do not believe there is true love in this world and are quite happy with the idea of finding a suitable match to make do with. I have never heard them saying “I love you”, or kissing or hugging (at least not in front of me). It seems that all their love was directed towards me.

However, at the same time, I also experienced many quarrels and domestic violence. My father has a bad temper and he can fight with anyone when he loses it. As a result, both my grandma and my mum suffered physically and mentally, but they never called the police, just the ambulance.

I once asked my mother how she could put up with this and whether she had ever thought about divorce. Without doubt she experienced a lot of pain and had considered separation, but she was never brave enough to take any action, fearing the effect it would have on me and the family’s reputation.

I once said to her: “Mum, if you are not happy in your life with dad, you should divorce and find another path which may give you joy. Do not let how it looks to others hinder your pursuit of a healthy, enjoyable and meaningful life.” But she refused, however hard I tried to persuade her.

I love my parents, but I must admit that I don’t relish staying with them for a long period as the atmosphere is often negative; filled with lots of complaints, criticism, blame and argument.

Their approach to parenting was again rather different to what most readers would be used to. My dad would usually punish me if I made a mistake. I would be made to kneel on a wooden washboard and he would slap my face or smack my bottom with slippers. The most serious punishment was when they shut me outside and did not allow me back into the flat.

All of these things happened before I was 10 years old, because it was then that I left home to sail, and it never happened afterwards because I had so little holiday to go back home and see my parents.

Away from home I also experienced violence against children in both the swimming and sailing teams. The belief was that the young wouldn’t learn and change without suffering pain. My swimming coach, standing on one end of the pool, would swing a thick elastic band in a circle. As we turned at the end of a length, our arms and legs couldn’t escape being hit by the band and we would have to continue swimming in pain, with clear red marks on all four limbs. In the sailing team, apart from the regular slap on the head or standing for long hours facing the wall, the most popular punishment was running. After being ordered to run an extra five or ten kilometres in the dark at the end of the day, few would dare make the same mistake again.

I didn’t feel particularly bad about these punishments at the time because the same things happened to many other children. But, looking back on it, I think it was probably one of the reasons why my character is to be obedient and why I behave as a ‘good girl’ (as perceived by Chinese parents). However, in the long term I do think it had some negative effect; stopping me thinking critically for myself.

My parents also taught me to be a mean, stingy person – to keep things for myself rather than share with others. This is a Shanghai trait. The Shanghainese have a good reputation for being shrewd and smart, but a bad one for being selfish and hostile. They have an enormous sense of pride in being from a big city and see themselves as superior to others. For example, many parents from Shanghai would forbid their children to marry a person from another province. What is more, those living in Shanghai city would even be against the idea of finding a partner from rural places within the Shanghai province.

Shanghai citizens used to regard outsiders as poor, dirty and uncivilised, and this idea is deeply rooted in my parents’ generation. I would guess this is declining as my generation tend to be more open, tolerant and well educated.

I am pleased that, once I started sailing, the team life helped me to cultivate a more generous and cooperative personality. After travelling around China, I have found people in other provinces to be more friendly, warm-hearted and enthusiastic.

*

I didn’t learn about healthy eating from my parents as they encouraged me to eat a lot of food, which they thought was good for me. For example, five eggs, dozens of chicken legs or wings, a big bowlful of shrimps, animal organs or pigs’ feet might all be eaten in one meal, along with drinking 2,000ml of milk and 1,000ml of yoghurt every day. Mostly they deep fried the food to make it taste delicious, then stir- or pan-fried using lots of pork oil, salt or soy sauce.

It wasn’t until later on, when I needed to lose weight for the Optimist dinghy, that I started to try vegetables and fruit.

Now, after years as a professional sportswoman, and having read some books on nutrition, my diet is much healthier. But when I try to convince my parents of the benefit of a balanced diet and eating nutritious foods, they still refuse to change or accept what I say. They say that the Chinese have had no problems eating the way they have done for thousands of years.

*

I cannot leave talking about my parents without mentioning some things that I inherited from them. I was born partially deaf, with about half the hearing of an ordinary person – this was inherited from my father who had about two thirds of his hearing. My left eye can barely make out anything due to poor sight, called amblyopia, which was passed on from my mother.

I have since discovered that both of these disabilities can be corrected or improved, if found out early and treated before the age of 12. It was a pity that my parents did not take these hereditary problems seriously and missed the opportunity to solve and fix them. They obviously have a huge impact on my daily life.

Nevertheless I appreciate my parents so much for giving me life, providing me love and raising me to the best of their ability.

*

China is progressing so rapidly and its people are advancing generation by generation: my grandmother was illiterate, unable to read or write; my mother only did the compulsory education in primary and middle school; I finally had the chance to study at university. The Chinese will become more international, more open and more enlightened with globalisation. But we should always be aware of what has happened in the past, and remember our history to learn from it, while marching boldly into a new era.

Interlude 1: A Balanced Life

I cannot over-emphasise the importance of balance in our daily life. We need to ensure that there is a balance between:

• Training and rest

• Study and fun

• Eating healthy food and the food you enjoy (maybe some junk food)

I firmly believe that it is only when you are getting a high level of satisfaction and enjoyment from both your family (and friends) and your career (work, study or sport) that you can truly be happy and successful.

I felt it was a pity that there were so many strict team regulations which meant that I, like other Chinese athletes, was not able to see my family and spend time with them. I only saw them once or twice a year for one or two weeks’ holiday.

Family and friends play a crucial role in giving us the emotional strength and extra...