Giordano Discovering Significance

A Self-Reflection and Journaling Process about how our Experiences and Relationships affect our Success and Impact
1. Auflage 2018
ISBN: 978-1-5439-4852-3
Verlag: BookBaby
Format: EPUB
Kopierschutz: Adobe DRM (»Systemvoraussetzungen)

E-Book, Englisch, 222 Seiten

The journey from self-doubt to empowerment can be blocked by our own self-perception, but it doesn't have to be. Discovering Significance will help you reframe your experiences and examine your relationships so you can work past these self-imposed limits and discover your authentic self. Find success, happiness, purpose and courage-so that when your next moment of truth arrives, you won't find yourself paralyzed, but ready to take a leap of faith toward your ideal future. Discovering Significance will help you find the motivation to go all-in for the things that matter the most.

Autoren/Hrsg.

Giordano, Philip

Leseproben

Chapter 1 Have I Lived to My Potential? I have these moments of feeling like I’m stuck on the edge of a cliff, clinging to the safety of the rocks, but desperately wanting to jump off and fly. In these moments, I see everything that holds me back, and yet I still can’t let go and trust that my wings will carry me. We all have our own personal cliffs in life, and most of us spend our whole lives never jumping off. I believe my job as a coach is to meet someone at the top of that cliff and help them learn to let go of their fears so that they can soar to greatness. I have dedicated my life to helping others take that all-important leap of faith into the unknown, and go “all in,” as I like to say. Despite knowing I have helped others and continue to do so, I feel this nagging sense that I have not leaped myself. My biggest fear, which has held me back throughout my life, is that others perceive me as incongruent, or inauthentic when it comes to my values and my actions. There are times when I’m not sure whether I have myself lived what I have asked others to do when I coach them; I start to feel like a hypocrite. Today, as these thoughts and doubts swirl in my mind, it is my birthday, and I am feeling particularly reflective. As I sit on my deck in the early morning hours, the thoughts of self-doubt paint a vivid picture that I am an epic failure. They are debilitating and make it so I can’t see any other possible alternative. It is incredible how this feeling permeates my very core and can shut me down completely. I sit there thinking about my life and all that I could have accomplished. I can’t help but think that perhaps I did not go “all in.” My mind supplies some facts to support my thinking. I have never been on a winning team. The only participation trophy I received was from a bowling league when I was in third grade back in 1978. Out of a high school graduating class of over 250 students, I ranked over 200. I seemed to be always the last one to know things. In my sales career, I would produce well enough on the stack rankings to get close to the top but never pushed to number one. My weight ranges from 187lb to 350lbs at any given time, usually on the high end giving me the medical label of morbidly obese. I am a diabetic, and I struggle with discipline. What have I accomplished? Always a dreamer with a vision, yet somehow, I view myself as never the one to put the work into achieving the dream altogether. These are the thoughts that cascade through my mind as I prepare for a celebration that is about my life. A time of reflection to look at my life and all that I could have done. A time to answer questions and remember. I can’t help but convince myself that I did not go “all-in.” As I sit contemplating my life, my thoughts turn to my past experience and picture myself giving a presentation in a seminar or delivering a keynote address. Have you ever experienced what it is like to go “ALL-IN?” I am talking about taking that leap of faith. Standing on the very top of the cliff knowing you have the passion and desire for your life to be extraordinary. Knowing that as you leap you will be jumping into living the vision and passion of your life’s purpose. Your dream represents the positive impact you want to have in your community and the world. You have seen the vision in your mind’s eye. You have felt the emotion of what it would be like to accomplish the goal. I picture standing on the top of a cliff with the voice inside my head providing an exhilarating soundtrack of what it would be like if I committed to going all in. Have you had this same experience? While, standing on the edge, seeing, hearing and feeling what the future could hold, all of a sudden you JUMP! You don’t know if you will be successful. At that moment you don’t know if there is deep enough water to break your fall. You have taken the time to plan, but you still are not sure if the parachute will open or even if you have a parachute. In that exact moment, adrenaline is pumping through your nervous system; you are making decisions, everything is clicking. You are feeling alive! Your mind provides you this picture and the feelings that go with it. So I ask, have you ever truly gone “all-in”? Your heart is pounding. Sweat is building. Time is standing still. Your senses have you experiencing every little detail. You are in tune with the environment, and you have entered a state of flow. Have you ever gone “all-in”? Or have you dreamed what reality could be if you choose to go “all-in”? Think about this. You are passionate about your values, your work, your favorite cause, but something is blocking you that when you stand on the top of that cliff, you become paralyzed. You formulated a good plan, but somehow you don’t know where to begin, or something in your mind is blocking you. Your mind’s eye switches off the full-color movie with vivid, loud surround sound showing what it is like accomplishing your goal and starts to play the black and white “What If’s Movie.” The experience in the present moment changes from excitement and motivation into doubting your ability, knowledge, and confidence. Everything slows down and moves in slow motion. The desire is not there. Now, truly, you are not sure where to begin. You experience anxiety as you stand on the edge of the cliff of possibility. The “What-If’s Movie” seems overwhelming. What if I fail? What if I succeed and life changes? Am I the right person for the job? Do I have the ability? Do I have the right knowledge? Do I have the skill? What if others are better at this than me? Am I a leader? Will I make a difference? Is this goal worth all the effort? The “What If’s Movie” shows scenes based on what you have learned from the unique experiences of your life. Your mind shows you times of doubt from the scenes of your past. You stand there at the top of the cliff, wondering if you should go all in, wondering if you should take that jump. You fixate your stare in the direction of your unique vision. The image on the horizon that represents the best version of you. The vision incorporates you making the impact you desire. You see the full color, sound movie, along with the feelings of achievement associated with the importance of the impact you hope to have, but it is in the distance and very faint. The voice inside your head is talking you out of jumping. The feeling is paralyzing. All you must do is take the next step to see if you can fly, yet there is no movement. You experience fear, and it keeps your perception of safety in place and keeps you from acting. You decide not to jump into your vision based on fear. FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real However, that positive vision filled with passion and energy is always lurking in your subconscious, always playing and at times seems vivid. You admire those who have leaped. The individuals who have put in the hard work and discovered they could fly. These achievers even make it seem easy. You imagine that they know what is like to be extraordinary. You want to be EXTRAORDINARY! You want your life to matter and want to make a positive impact on this world. When I’m working as a coach, I often refer to that “What Ifs Movie”. The movie that plays in your head when you’re standing at the edge of that cliff, wondering if you can jump. The “What Ifs Movie” shows scenes based on what you have learned from previous experiences, and makes you start to doubt your ability, knowledge, and confidence. While this movie is playing in your head, your anxiety and all the what-ifs become overwhelming. What if I fail? What if I succeed and life changes? What if I don’t have the ability? What if I don’t have the right knowledge? What if I don’t possess the skills to do this task? What if others are better at this than me? Will I make a difference? Is it worth all the effort? You stand there at the top of the cliff, wondering if you should go “all in,” wondering if you should take that jump. The voice in the movie is talking you out of jumping, and it paralyzes you. All you have to do is take the next step to see if you can fly, yet you don’t move. Why can’t you jump? It is because when we are in these moments, we often experience a deep sense of fear, and that fear wants to keep us safe, so it tries to stop us from taking that leap of faith. It is time to take the leap and go “all-in” As I sit in my chair, my mind returns to thinking about my fears, and it races with all that I could have done and could have been. I wonder to myself, have I truly gone “all in”? Phil’s Coaching Corner:
Have I Lived to My Potential? Self-doubt is a natural occurrence. In leadership and communication coaching, we work to exit our comfort zone and enter a challenge/learning zone. Our comfort zones represent the place we feel safe and secure, not just physically, but mentally, too. To enter the challenge/learning zone, we must leave safety behind and allow those uncomfortable thoughts and feelings to enter our mind. The actions one takes once they enter...